You’ve no doubt heard many of the popular self-actualization quotes:
- “If your dreams don’t scare you, they’re not big enough.”
- “Replace fear of the unknown with curiosity.”
- “It’s not because things are difficult that we do not dare, it’s because we do not dare that things are difficult.”
- “A ship in harbor is safe, but that’s not what ships are built for.”
Courage is an unspoken theme in all those sentiments.
Interested in stretching your wings and flying to new heights? Jenny Wood offers a master class in WILD COURAGE: Go After What You Want and Get It. She’s a New York Times bestselling author, speaker, former Google executive, and former Harvard Business School researcher who says “real success isn’t about following the rules or waiting your turn.”
So, how does she define wild courage?
“Think about something you want,” she says. “It could be a job, a relationship, a project. Then think about what gets between you and achieving that goal.”
In training thousands of people on success, leadership, and influence, Wood says the same theme kept coming up when people felt stuck: their relationships to fear. Fear of failure. Fear of uncertainty. Fear of judgment of others.
“Wild courage is the process of feeling that fear and taking action anyway,” she says. “It’s the set of tools that help you go after what you want and get it.”
Woods says wild courage helps people “reclaim nine traits from their negative shackles” and teaches them how to apply those traits in a savvy and sane way to supercharge their success.
- Weird: Win as you or lose as “who?”
- Selfish: Be your own champion.
- Shameless: Kick imposter syndrome to the curb and self-promote with ease.
- Obsessed: Push, persist, and perform at your highest level.
- Nosy: Get curious to network confidently and learn from others.
- Manipulative: Build influence with empathy and manage up like a pro.
- Brutal: Draw lines and stick to them. Embrace the power of no.
- Reckless: Err on the side of action and take healthy risks.
- Bossy: Steer others to success, even if you’re not in charge yet.
What’s going on in our society these days that makes the need for courage such a hot topic?
“Given the rapid transformations we’re all experiencing—politically, economically, and with AI—there’s more fear than ever,” Wood says. “But that’s actually great news because fear is in your control. Fear, you can work with. Muster the wild courage to chase what you want in life, and you’ll discover a vital truth: whether you succeed or fail at doing any one thing, you’ll never feel as purposeful, powerful, and alive as when you’re pushing through fear toward the success and joy on the other side. Everything you’ve ever wanted is waiting for you on the other side of fear. It’s right there waiting for you.”
The WINN Mindset
Wood talks about what she calls the What I Need Now (WINN) mindset and how it can help a person with career navigation.
“Align yesterday’s ambitions with today’s circumstances,” she advises. “Just as your long-term vision informs your day-to-day decision-making, your day-to-day experiences should shape your vision. Changing course often feels selfish because your plans inevitably involve other people. However, everyone’s needs and desires change over time. What you wanted may no longer resonate.”
As a strategy, she says, WINN means continuously coordinating your short-term experience with your long-term vision. She provides an example:
- Last year, you did the laundry. This year, your partner’s firm went fully work from home while you’re still commuting five days a week. WINN: renegotiate the split of household chores.
- You said no to a third date. Four months later, you’re wondering if you made the wrong call. WINN: call them and book date number three if they’re still open.
- Two years ago, you set your heart on becoming a manager. After a short stint to cover a leave, you’ve decided management isn’t for you. WINN: find another ladder to climb.
Wood says she is saddened when smart, talented people don’t advance because they hold themselves back. She cites a study from the University of Leeds showing that 75% of employees lack confidence at work. “People limit their full potential when they’re too scared to ask for the promotion, too nervous to stand out, and mostly, too hesitant to identify and share their strengths with leaders in their organization. Being ‘shameless’ begins with owning your strengths.”
Shameless begins with owning your strengths, she says. “Embrace and highlight what you can offer. Ask yourself: What’s a struggle for others but easy for me? What am I passionate about? Where have I made the greatest impact? If these questions bring up negative self-talk, flip those defeatist thoughts on their head. No experience? I bring a fresh perspective. Don’t know the internal politics yet? I have an unbiased view of the players. Every weakness is a strength from a different perspective. It’s on you to figure out how to leverage everything you’ve got.”
NAP Traps
On the job, how can people avoid NAP (not actually promotable) work without seeming uncooperative?
“NAP work is made of up of tasks that aren’t part of your job description and won’t advance your career,” Wood says. “Aim to limit them to 15% of your time at work. Examples: taking notes in the meeting, organizing the offsite, planning the team dinner, scheduling a VP’s day in your office location, leading the well-being pillar, and so on.
Wood suggests reviewing your tasks and writing down everything you’ve been asked to do that isn’t explicitly a part of your job description. “Moving forward, add to that list of NAP traps whenever you’re given a task that needs doing but not necessarily by you. Keep this list where you will see it when deciding priorities.”
To politely decline these tasks without seeming uncooperative, she advises, “point to more strategic, higher-profile work you have on your plate: increasing customer satisfaction by 12% or leading the AI integration plan for your division.”
How does Wood help people stop worrying about what others think of them?
“As mentioned earlier, my biggest blockers are three fears: fear of uncertainty, fear of failure, and fear of judgment of others,” she says. “In my 18-years at Google, I battled these daily. There was the fear I wouldn’t impress my boss in our weekly one-on-one. Fear that I would say something stupid in that big meeting full of VIPs. Fear no one would ever forget the presentation I flubbed. Cool and collected Google exec on the outside, a lot more going on on the inside.”
What finally helped her push past the fear was naming it in the moment and remembering the “Spotlight Effect”—the idea that no one was lying awake at night thinking about her mistakes because they were too busy worrying about their own. “The truth is,” she says, “everyone’s got their own spotlight on their head. Name which of the three fears you feel, remember the Spotlight Effect, and you will push past the fear to the joy and success on the other side.