Do you ever pause and think about where you’ve come from and how your upbringing shaped who you are today? I certainly do.
My roots are deeply Italian, stretching from the Aeolian Islands to the vicinity of Trieste. Like many, my ancestors came to America seeking a better future, a story echoing through Ellis Island tales.
My dad was this hardworking fireman, a man of strong will but equally strong temper. This forced us kids to tiptoe around him, craving his approval but often dodging his outbursts. He was always moving, always doing, and unfortunately, his death at a young age was a testament to the saying, “The candle that burns twice as bright, burns half as long.”
In contrast, my mom was a rock. She was always there, always believing in us. She was warm and comforting, teaching me about love, respect, and our own worth. While Dad taught me about the toughness of life, Mom showed me the power of love and belief.
As I grew older, especially during those high school to college transition years, the contrast between my parents’ influences became stark. Because Dad thought college would be a waste of time, he pushed me to get a civil service job. When I went against his wishes and pursued the path of college, I felt like a fish out of water. I wasn’t confident in my path but was eager to explore.
College was a revelation and a paradox. On one hand, it shook my confidence. But on the other, it made me stronger than ever. I discovered a passion for learning and an ability to excel that I hadn’t realized I possessed. Yet, it wasn’t without its challenges. I wrestled with imposter syndrome and battled skepticism from professors who doubted my abilities. Each hurdle, however, taught me more about my own resilience and determination.
My journey didn’t stop at community college. I carried on to Cal State Chico and then beyond, each step further shaping me into who I am. Along the way, I learned to navigate others’ doubts, harness my background to my advantage, and push beyond perceived limitations. My family’s legacy of hard work and sacrifice and the contrasting influences of my parents instilled in me a drive to succeed in order to honor their sacrifices by making the most of the opportunities they provided me.
What’s fascinating is how our backgrounds—complete with their trials, triumphs, and tribulations—shape us. They can limit us, sure, but they also offer unique strengths and perspectives that we can use to our advantage. My story is a testament to that. From the hardworking resilience of my dad to the unwavering support of my mom, from the challenges of my educational journey to the successes that followed, every step was influenced by my past. All of this certainly influenced the way that I lead and, more importantly, why I choose to be a selfless leader.
So, here’s a thought for you: How does your background influence your life today? Are there aspects of it you see as limiting, or do you view your past as a source of strength?
Our stories are uniquely ours, but they’re interconnected by common threads of family, struggle, and growth. Recognizing and embracing where we come from can empower us to navigate our future with confidence and purpose.
Only as we understand where we’ve come from can we understand who we are today.