“Ego” is the term used to define our own sense of self-worth. Often, it is applied in a negative context, with the phrase “inflated egos” associated with arrogant or unapproachable leaders. On the other hand, leaders without healthy egos may struggle to inspire confidence and trust in their teams. So, when it comes to ego management, there’s a delicate balance to strike. Egos can be both a blessing and a curse.
This Saturday marks World Ego Awareness Day, making it an opportune time to reflect on how ego can impact on both individual and organizational success. Here are four key ego-related mistakes for leaders to avoid:
1. Focusing on themselves to the detriment of their teams
Ego-driven leaders can operate in a “bubble” where they only see and hear what they want. As a result, they can quickly lose sight of the bigger picture and cut themselves off from opportunities for personal and organizational learning. They may also fail to recognize, understand and support their team members with their challenges, leading their team to experience frustration, decreased productivity and damaged wellbeing.
“To create a culture of trust and psychological safety for your team to perform effectively and sustainably, you need to leave your ego at the door,” says Lesley Cooper, founder of consultancy WorkingWell and author of Brave New Leader. “Be willing to hear when your actions or the wider company culture have had a detrimental impact on someone.”
Cooper believes that if a leader is only focused on their own goals, rather than the organization’s overall success, teams will not be inspired around a shared vision for growth. “Only if you put your ego aside can you create a culture of trust, elevate your team’s productivity and nurture their wellbeing,” she explains.
2. Being blinkered to the expertise of others
When you reach the lofty heights of leadership, you are setting the course and putting things in place to make that vision a reality. Nevertheless, there is a real danger that this influence can go straight to a leader’s head, leaving them blinkered to the expertise that others can offer, argues Alexis Sikorsky, a consultant who helps entrepreneurs to scale and exit their businesses and author of Cashing Out.
“One of the biggest traps for a leader is thinking you don’t need help,” Sikorsky explains. “Whether it’s because you think you always know what’s best, or you are scared of losing control and admitting you don’t have the answers.”
Ultimately, as a leader, you can’t know everything and you cannot do everything yourself. “Getting the right help, at the right time, or accepting when it’s time to step aside can make a massive difference to the trajectory of the business,” Sikorsky notes.
3. Neglecting the needs of your audience when presenting
Being able to make an impact as a presenter isn’t just desirable, it’s a critical skill for leaders. Confidence is key, but a big ego can be a significant barrier to becoming an impactful presenter.
“In any presentation, the focus should be on the needs of your audience and clearly understanding how you will deliver value to them,” says Kris Flegg, founder and director of Presentation Design Co and author of The Presentation Playbook.“A big ego creates a self-centered approach where presenters think they can wing it, or that audiences automatically care about what they have to say. These types of presenters miss the crucial preparation needed and it’s likely their presentation is lost even before it begins.”
Flegg recommends setting your ego aside and start from a place of assuming your audience is completely apathetic to you. “Then do the work to understand them and tailor your message to something that will make them care,” he says. “That shift in mindset means you stand a much stronger chance of connecting with them and achieving your desired impact.”
4. Being afraid of experimentation
Dr Lisa Turner, founder of mindset training provider CETfreedom, believes that a certain level of ego is necessary for leaders. In fact, leaders with low egos may struggle to take the initiative due to a fear of failure and a tendency to doubt their abilities and skills. This could prevent them from seeking new opportunities or experimenting with new technologies or processes.
“Small egos are often associated with low self-esteem and a fixed mindset,” says Turner. “The focus should be on building a growth mindset, a term coined by psychologist Carol Dweck, which describes the belief that abilities can be developed through dedication and hard work.”
Turner argues that leaders who develop a growth mindset are more likely to react well to challenges and take risks because they are not ruled by a fear of failure. Instead, they embrace the opportunity to learn.
“Building a strong and balanced ego begins with self-awareness and recognizing the need to build your ego and self-esteem simultaneously,” Turner explains. “If you have been masking low self-esteem with ego-driven behaviours, coaching can be invaluable to helping you identify and eliminate limiting beliefs.”