Welcome To The Family Office: Lessons From Fight Club

“Welcome to the family office. The first rule of the family office is: you do not talk about the family office.” Would it sound that unfamiliar for a family office to give such a Tyler Durden-style welcome to a new employee? While a touch dramatic, it’s entirely plausible, given the privacy that many hold onto as sacrosanct.

Author Chuck Palahniuk recently released his twentieth novel but its his first-published one, Fight Club, that is still arguably his best known. Released in 1996 it picked at modern society and our need for self-discovery, descent into rampant over-consumption and an inherent predilection for violence.

As visceral as the book was the film adaptation by director David Fincher, and despite a disappointing release it went on to obtain a cult-like status that makes an argument against the idea the book is always better than the movie. The film differed slightly from the book, perhaps most notably at the ending which promotes an even darker anti-consumerist message, but the themes and core story line remain.

Though Palahniuk’s novel comes across as individualistic, showing one man’s violent rebellion against the monotony of a normal yet materialistic lifestyle, the core themes can serve as a rather interesting lens to creatively explore the dynamics within family offices and the complexities involved with managing significant wealth, dealing with varying personalities and understanding the pressures and responsibilities of multi-generational wealth owners.

Identity and self-discovery

“This is your life and its ending one minute at a time.” The bleary isolation and disconnect portrayed in Fight Club are evident from the outset, taking the reader on a rather troublesome path down a journey of self discovery. While not so extreme, those with experience working with affluent families will find familiarity in the desire for self-discovery and questioning of identity.

Family dynamics are complex at the best of times, but with the added pressures of living up to a sometimes multi-generational reputation and the societal expectations thrown in with it, there is often a lot of questioning around individuality with family members. The need to define oneself beyond simply name, financial status and social circle is increasingly common, and aligns with a desire to search for purpose and meaning beyond material wealth.

While perhaps not always as dark and vicious as what flows through the pages of Fight Club, family members often struggle with self identity, even with a sense of guilt around the fortune they’ve created or are set to inherit, and will often try seek out authentic experiences through unusual methods.

Bringing focus to values and the importance of communication in relationships, building a sense of purpose for individuals as well as the family as a whole – these are part of the ‘soft side’ of family office management that are essential to long-term success and to thwart potential individually-driven conflicts that can affect operations.

Materialism and consumer culture

“The things you used to own, now they own you.”

The book’s anti-consumerism message is made very clear and plays a significant part in the overall spark that motivates the protagonist down such an unusual path. While it makes for a compelling fictional story, in reality our materialistic obsession has certainly not subsided.

If anything, our increased ability through social media to see the lifestyle of others has only accentuated our need to match or surpass what we see – perhaps partly why the affluent end up living very similar lives, regardless of what industry, country or background they originate from.

Thankfully, while our consumerism seems to have advanced unchecked since the book came out over 25 years ago, our understanding of significant issues the world faces has increased as has the desire to find more ways to contribute positively. Philanthropy has evolved, becoming more organized and collaborative, and the rise of impact investing as a means for wealth owners to align their investments with their values has been another positive evolution.

Just the fact that many wealth management platforms come with a means to classify and measure impact shows the increased value wealth owners apply to this, and suggests we will undoubtedly see more solutions to support this in the near future.

A need for catharsis

The physical fights in Fight Club undoubtedly serve as a form of catharsis, and while violence through a bare-knuckle boxing club in an underground parking lot is definitely not the suggested way to go, family offices do need to proactively find outlets that allow the expression of familial tensions as they look to find constructive resolutions.

Conflict is inevitable, as it is in any company or organization, and while it can be a complex area to manage there are better ways than physical violence, screaming matches or simply withdrawing from discussion. The right approach to conflict management can build relationships, stimulate ideas and even drive performance, which is why a well thought out governance framework is essential and will provide the structure to deal with serious disputes.

Having an external advisor with the deep knowledge and experience can also be invaluable, especially if there is disagreement across the broader family office or involving outside parties.

Anti-establishment sentiment

Fight Club’s story translates as the desire to challenge the status quo, certainly in a rather twisted way with the ominous Project Mayhem and its bleak objectives, but the overall concept of challenging the establishment is something very relevant to the modern family office world.

An increasing influence from the next generation of wealth owner means family offices needs to find ways to engage and educate them so that they can form an active part of a cohesive entity rather than rebel against it. Much of this is around appreciating the differences and seeing new ways of thinking as an advantage.

Progressive family offices will start to involve younger family members in the business affairs from a reasonably young age, then expand to provide them with the means to get involved in their own enterprises, a sandbox of sorts that allows them to rapidly learn lessons, albeit independently of the core family office operations.

The right guidance and structure will be rewarded with greater competence and can result in a redefinition of traditional roles and expectations, as well as less friction when it comes to considerations around succession.

Mental health and dissociation

Dissociative identity disorder is a key concept in the book, which (spoiler alert) provides the major twist in the story when the two main characters are revealed to be the same person. The book’s ending is not as dramatic as the movie but the mere fact that it concludes in a mental treatment facility shows how serious psychological issues are central.

Mental health is a massive issue both outside and within the professional world. Family offices can play a significant role in tackling this as well as the overall evolution of the wellness industry, already valued at more than $4.5 trillion. Supporting through investments in healthcare is a means to connect their financial goals with the desire to have a positive impact, which with the global population ageing isn’t just in their financial interest, but the interest of the current and future generations.

Being custodians for financial management and the lifestyles of wealth owners, family offices need to consider health to be the most valuable asset under management, meaning a proactive approach to confront any mental or physical health concerns around a family and put into place strategies that enable the best possible outcomes. This may involve concierge medical care or other long-term health solutions that have emerged from the growing array of wellness service providers aimed at wealth owners.

Fight Club is undoubtedly one of the more unique and thought-provoking fictional books of its time, and does come with a rather surreal side to it that can be dismissed as far from reality, yet the story challenges us to question a standardized version of normality and reflect on how popular culture affects self-identity.

For wealth owners and family offices that take a future-first approach, there is a need to challenge the status quo, to be more conscious and explore new ways to make a difference.

If those with the capital at hand can apply it solving society’s biggest environmental and socioeconomic challenges, then hopefully we can be in a stronger position to avoid the anarchy and violence presented to us in this book, which unfortunately feels rather prevalent in the world around us today.