By Chantell Preston
C200 member Chantell Preston has spent 20+ years in healthcare operations as an investor, advisor, and strategist. She has built and successfully exited several companies; her current role is CEO of Facilities Management Group (FMG). Chantell also serves as a lead partner for the Portfolia’s Active Aging and Longevity Fund I and II, as a coach & strategic planner for women and organizations as well as a member of YPO.
Are we as women leaders allowing societal norms to dictate our leadership styles? Society traditionally expects female leaders, more than their male counterparts, to be kind and friendly—as well as decisive and determined. These qualities are often seen as opposites, creating a ‘catch-22’ for women as they make their way to the top. The pursuit of these impossible ideals is what leads many women to become their own worst enemy.
Earlier in my career, I felt that I had to be an authoritarian leader to gain respect from my staff. I made the decisions; I did not take the time to get to know my staff on a personal basis and I was not approachable. As a woman in a male dominated industry, it seemed that I would be perceived as weak if I was empathetic and compassionate towards my staff. This leadership style was not my true personality, but I felt that it was the only way to gain the respect of not only my employees, but also professionals outside my organization.
As I grew emotionally and professionally, I got real about how I wanted to be perceived by the people around me. I allowed myself to be compassionate and vulnerable with my staff, which made them happier and more productive in addition to making me a better leader. Instead of being viewed as weak, I was seen as approachable and more receptive to new ideas from across the organization.
I also realized that if I wanted to accomplish my own goals, I needed to be my own advocate. Women leaders are often hesitant to ask for what they want, for fear of their assertiveness viewed as being too aggressive. This double standard is most evident in salary negotiations. Men are more than three times as likely as women to negotiate their first salary, according to a Glassdoor Salary Negotiation Insights Survey. The same survey revealed that more than two-thirds (68 percent) of women accepted the salary they were offered and did not negotiate.
A recent report from Harvard Law School supports the same concerns: “When women negotiate for higher salaries, they must behave contrary to deeply ingrained societal gender roles of women as passive, helpful, and accommodating. As a result, their requests often face a backlash: relative to men who ask for more, women are penalized financially, are considered less hirable and less likable, and are less likely to be promoted.”
Emerging leaders have different challenges than I had early in my career. Today’s employees require acknowledgment, growth opportunities, and life balance to feel valued and empowered. According to Gartner Chief of Research Chris Howard, “ The pandemic has been a catalyst to elevate personal purpose and values. Gartner surveyed more than 3,500 employees around the world in October 2021, and 65% said the pandemic had made them rethink the place that work should have in their life.”
The 2022 KPMG Women’s Leadership Summit Report reiterates this recent enhanced focus on company culture: ‘Eighty-nine percent of high-performing executive women surveyed reported that their organization’s ability to recruit and retain talent has changed over the past two years.’ Additionally, seventy-eight percent of their companies have kept flexible hours and schedules to retain staff. To support these requirements, leaders must manage with empathy and compassion.
At some point in our leadership career, women easily recognize the sacrifices we have made to get ahead—career, family, and friends. But what about acknowledging our accomplishments? It is amazing to me how many high-powered women discount their achievements or confide in me that, even after rising to the top of a company, they still experience imposter syndrome. Feelings of imposter syndrome are proven to be more prevalent in women than men, and are especially common in male-dominated working environments and industries. This self-doubt can lead to women to adopt unhealthy behaviors such as overworking, lowering self-esteem, and engaging in self-sabotage.
It’s important to surround yourself with other successful women who will support you and lift you up. Professional organizations for women provide a space to be open about the unique experiences and challenges of women leaders, with an emphasis on making connections and collaboration. Immersing myself in a like-minded peer group within C200 and also within other women’s leadership communities has not only helped me to become a better leader, but also a better person.
When we focus on using our natural strengths as women—empathy, compassion, and vulnerability—we’ll begin to see them as an asset rather than a disadvantage. Here are some of the ways to overcome your own negative thinking to become the leader you want to be:
- Get real with your goals. Perform a deep dive into your personal and company goals to determine the areas of opportunities to make effective changes. Be vulnerable. Ask yourself the hard questions.
- Get real with your time. Prioritize and examine how you can best utilize your time to accomplish both your personal and professional goals. Maintaining a work/life balance will enable you to be a more effective leader.
- Get real with your plan. Take ownership of your journey by creating your own playbook with actionable tasks to achieve your goals.
When you get real, you get results. These strategies have been instrumental in guiding my journey to becoming the person I am today. When I learned to trust my instincts and lean into my strengths, I was able to find balance, lead effectively, and most importantly—live more authentically.